Trapped in the cocoon
I built around myself
I wonder what made me
Build it in the first place
It may have been an attempt
To heal the bruises and hurt
From an emotional battle
Being fought for years
To prove a silly point
Against myself
Against the one I loved
Against family
It resulted in losses
Loss of trust
Loss of innocence
Loss of the sense of purpose
And then I decided
To steel myself
From any further
Emotional damage
I set aside all painful memories
Locked and hidden away
I built a facade around me
To guard against further pain
The pain was fooled
For quite some time
But eventually it got me
The facade gave way
Now the pain
Is ubiquitous
Within the facade
And outside
However far I may run
I cannot hide
I can always feel
Its presence by my side
It's almost like family now
You may not agree with them
But you're bonded nevertheless
As nature often controls choice
PS: This was written in a simple poetic mood, not as mournful as it sounds. And yes, it's an attempt at healing too. I recently found out that the mind never forgets anything (I believed I conveniently cut out a lot of painful memories).
