Fear (II)

It was fear that made me think
Made me look into a direction other than yours
To try and find something that would be mine for eternity

Sure, those were hard times
I was almost driven to the point of insanity
My brain almost gave up but my heart, stubborn as ever, didn't

I somehow always knew
That the fear tried to conceal something
Something beautiful, something I always yearned for

This fear, I perceived
Was guarding whatever valuable there was
Not only from me, but from anyone who'd want to have it

I think of fighting my fears as a test
To know for myself, how badly I want something
How much I'd wait and what I would sacrifice to get it

My fears keep surfacing
Frequently enough to keep me on my toes
And they drive me constantly in some weird direction

Like now, for example
Where I have come, so far away from you
Who meant everything to me for those many years of my life

And look at me here, today
Conscious of nothing else but myself
Surprisingly, happier than I could ever imagine

Fear does these things to you
It tries you till you quit or conquer
You can choose to face it or turn your back on it

There's no neglecting it, however
Fear follows you when you try to run away
Face it to slay it, there's nothing you can't defeat

That's what I learned all along
Conquering the fears that haunted me
So that now I expect something better beyond every fear I encounter